So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
