She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
