I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
