i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
