I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
