you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Randomize
