Where are you?
In a non slutty way
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
