i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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