i'm signing you up for texting rehab
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize
