the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize