I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize