Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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