My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize