So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
ttyl tear gas
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
