Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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