Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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