we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
