you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
