But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
