you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
50% drunk capacity currently
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
