So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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