bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
we're making bets on your personal life
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
