shes about as inviting as chlamydia
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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