Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Drake has all the answers
Randomize