I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
