operation have a gay friend backfired
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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