I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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