I think my fart just growled at me.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
