She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I supernannyed him into submission
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
