I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
