yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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