so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
