new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize