I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
No subtext here. People are naked.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
