Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
There's always time for handjobs
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
