i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
