this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
