I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Randomize
