I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Randomize
