that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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