Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
...so i touched it.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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