There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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