Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
