Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
