I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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