No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You need a sexual gate keeper
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize