The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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