honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Randomize
