what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
