Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
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