i just had sex bonerless
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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